REVIEW BY ASHLEIGH SHEARMAN

EDITED BY MYA HELOU

This year UMMTA, headed by President Nishka Varghese, have gone in a bold direction with their traditional Sitzprobe performance; fully staging four new works from young Australian playwrights and composers Poppy Poems by Eadie Milne, Stuck in an Office with a Bunch of F***wits by The Vreugdenburg brothers (Harry and Jake), Something Borrowed Something Blue from Ethan Francis-D’Amour, and Quelched by Conor Boussioutas.

The mammoth undertaking was helmed by co-producers Olivia Di Grazia and Yani Joannidis, musical director Josh Drake, vocal director Mia Mazzarella, and co-choreographers Sienna Shepard and Kate Cunningham, all of whom dedicated almost a full half a year to realise these works.

As the house lights went down, the buzz in the audience was palpable. Conversations hushed, faces turned from their neighbours to the stage to watch the house curtains open, revealing a striking image. A field of little white crosses in perfect rows and columns, a single figure silhouetted against the sunset orange background. The sound of a solo bugle playing The Last Post is accompanied by a ghostly chorus of women singing about the losses of war and the pain they feel. 

Poppy Poems, directed by Alessio Russo, tells the stories of Paul Serong (Pacey Dunshea), Joey Hughes (Archie Jacka), and James Kerr (Zayd Chaudhry) – boys who enlist to join the front. The letters they send and receive take centre stage through the Telegraph Boy (Isabella Troise), a narrator guiding the audience through the emotional journey. We also see Liesel (Ava Ruljancich) and Mary (Jessica Harrison-O’Toole), mothers of Paul and Joey, as they experience the war from a distance and watch the spectre of the Telegraph Boy deliver the dreaded “condolence letters” to the other women in their life. We also follow Molly McClean (Zoe Boussioutas), a woman who is forced to give up her dreams of academia to work manual labour for the war effort.

The retelling of the First World War’s trenches and home front is an ambitious task for 40 minutes and some concessions must be made. Our narrator takes up the slack, delivering information filled monologues and interjecting into the action to provide context. At times this can be distracting, disrupting the flow of some scenes, but in others providing much needed information to move the plot along.

Lighting Designer Zani Micallef, assisted by Darcy Hersbach and Kalyani Vatsala, creates dramatic and moving moments with their lighting. Supported by the sound design from Penelope Toong, Dev McKenzie and Enje Hazia, moments of quiet tension are broken by harsh gunfire and the disappearance of characters on stage.  

The action of Poppy Poems comes to a head when James volunteers as a runner – perhaps the most dangerous job in the trenches – with Joey and Paul doing their best to dissuade him. Finally, we see those lucky few return home to unite with their loved ones. Everyone is changed by the experience and we are left with  a final, intimate image of Paul asking Molly why the others had to die for peace.

Following the deeply patriotic and emotional story of Poppy Poems seems a tall order, but Stuck in an Office with a Bunch of F***wits does it with aplomb. Director Oli Craig pulls us into a deeply comic story. The Vreugdenburg Brothers seem to take inspiration from shows like The Office and films like Office Space to deliver an irreverent and hilarious comedy about, well, being stuck in an office with a bunch of f***wits.

The show begins with a short induction video to Ralphington Beard Wax & Co and The Office style opening credits, introducing us to each of the characters in brief. We’re then dropped into Amelia’s (Neave McGeehan) first day at the company, meeting her fast talking, buzzword loving boss J.P. Finnegan (Angus Fitzpatrick). Hilarity ensues as we meet Amelia’s other coworkers, a cast of bizarre characters including the nihilistic Devon (Kaz Daly), army loving Jamie (Belle White), nepo baby Ashton (Michael Sun), high-strung Casey (Tom Worsnop), elderly devout Christian Margaret (Dempsey Doyle), and self-styled rival Georgina (Cara McKie).

Just as Amelia is finally settling into the place, the harsh tones of a hurricane alarm sound, forcing everybody in the office to bunker down for 24 straight hours. Thankfully, J.P. is prepared for this eventuality with his signature team building exercises, including “Who Stole the Gluten Free Vegan High Protein Cookie from the Gluten Free Vegan High Protein Cookie Jar?” and mandatory karaoke. 

The show itself is endlessly funny, as characters and situations become more and more bizarre. But perhaps the highlight of the performance was during a particularly fast piece of line delivery when Angus tripped up on a line. Rather than attempting to fully clarify or go back, Angus took himself to one of the captioning TVs and read the line directly from the screen. The audience erupted with laughter as Angus explained “it’s opening night!” It’s a credit to Oli Craig’s direction that even as the show seems to stumble, it can turn a somersault and land on its feet spectacularly.

Micallef’s lighting has beautiful moments to shine here, as the show constantly shifts between the drab office space, the dramatic music theatre solo, a disco party, and 60s pastiche, with Toong’s and Dev’s sound deftly following suit.

Don’t let Chloe Bausor and Stuti Ghosh’s painted flats and fold away tables fool you, Stuck in the Office with a Bunch of F***wits will have you wanting to be Part of the Team.

After a brief intermission, Something Borrowed Something Blue strikes up. The wedding of Roman Keys (Harry Vreugdenburg) and Cassandra Vaughn (Isabella Troise) is falling apart before it’s even begun, with family secrets and expectations crawling out of the woodwork.

Centre to the story is Roman’s internalised biphobia and homophobia, a deeply complex and difficult issue amplified by his father Solomon’s (Angus Fitzpatrick) own homophobic beliefs and expectations that his son upholds the family business and image. 

Among the many subplots is the story of ‘auntie’ Georgia (Kenneth Chai), a relative of Cassandra’s. We learn that ‘auntie’ Georgia is in fact Cassandra’s father who has transitioned, but due to the prejudices of Georgia’s wife Miriam (Molly Dale), Georgia is restricted from being a parent to Cassandra. As a trans woman, this plot hit the hardest and was perhaps the most difficult part of the Something Borrowed, Something Blue for me to see. During one number, Molly accuses Georgia of placing her needs before that of her family and states that she wishes Georgia were dead.

The choice to feature a trans character will always come with its own host of difficulties and challenges, such as understanding the trans experience and the potential “man in a dress” caricature. As a trans woman, I am somewhat biased in the belief that trans roles should be filled by trans people matching the character’s identity. Despite this, I must say Kenneth Chai does an excellent job navigating the limited material given in exploring the relationship between Georgia and her family. Both Georgia and Jessica Harrison-O’Toole’s Courtney (Georgia’s other daughter) share a touching duet where they console each other, “you would have looked wonderful in white.” 

Praise must also be given to Bradley Watson’s Noah, the wedding photographer and secret lover of Roman, who delivers an emotional and stirring song “If I were a girl” about the homophobia he faces in loving Roman.

Bausor and Ghosh’s set transforms the Union Theatre stage into a wedding reception space, complete with a fabric arch over the wedding party table and welcome easel set to one side. Every member of the cast is dressed to the nines in well-fitting suits and elegant gowns by costume designer Bella Florence and her assistants Jamie Tran and Ebony Faulkner.

Something Borrowed, Something Blue, directed by Ethan Francis D’Amour with the assistance of Alex Fallshaw, asks many questions about the nature of family, identity and relationships. To answer all of these seemed ambitious for a 40-minute musical, and I felt disappointed at the lack of real resolution to any of the plot lines as Roman and Cassandra agreed to ditch the wedding and talk at home just as the play felt it was getting underway.

Rounding out the night was “Quelched,” another irreverent comedy following Phil Todd (Pacey Dunshea) as he joins the new dating app Quelch – whose phone notifications are accompanied by a satisfyingly disgusting wet squelch – and abandons his best friend and roommate Mike (Michael Werden) to chase his new-found fame thanks to his uniquely shaped penis.

After finding his high school crush Olivia (Ella Nixon), who convinces him to send her a dick pic, she posts the photo online for all to see. The ethics of posting other people’s nudes online aside, the remarkable resemblance of Phil’s penis to film star Christian Bale launches him to meteoric fame. The influence and power quickly go to his head as Mr Dankworth (Archie Jacka), creator and founder of Quelch, becomes Phil’s manager. Mr Dankworth puts him in more and more troubling situations such as claiming the non-existence of Antarctica and delivering Logan Paul’s infamous apology to atone for his social missteps. Meanwhile, Mike continually attempts to reconnect with Phil, calling him in his opulent new living space, which leads to a heartfelt solo from Werden.  

Director James Pringle has done an excellent job leaning into the absurdity of the piece, never giving the action a moments rest to truly reflect on what has happened. Instead, Quelched focuses on what happens next as the series of increasingly bizarre and unreal events that just keep happening.

Finally, fame and abuse catch up with Mr Dankworth who is arrested and taken away, while Phil and Mike come together after successfully launching a court case against Mr Dankworth. 

Technical gremlins are to be expected in theatre, and they came and went as the night progressed with missed cues or malfunctioning microphones. Unfortunately, it was during Quelched that they became most apparent, with Mike’s song about missing Phil being delivered acoustically. Werden rose to the occasion, however, and soldiered on to deliver the heart of the musical. 

Quelched begins with a bizarre premise and departs into more and more absurd circumstances, constantly reminding us that there is normalcy even in the strangest of events. Director James Pringle has done an excellent job combining the absurd with the mundane with the flashy.

Despite the wide variety and differences between each of the four 40-minute musicals on show, UMMTA’s Sitzprobe sings in bold four-part harmony. Creating, as one audience member put it so succinctly when leaving the theatre, “a big night’s entertainment.” It’s a credit to the dedication and skill of the entire UMMTA committee, the Sitzprobe creative team, cast, crew and everyone involved that a performance of this size and scale has come together. UMMTA’s Sitzprobe is a spectacle that must be seen to be believed.

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UMMTA’S Sitzprobe featuring new musicals Poppy Poems, Stuck in an Office with a Bunch of F***wits, Something Borrowed Something Blue and Quelched played May 15th-17th at the Union Theatre.

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ASHLEIGH SHEARMAN (she/they) is a trans theatre maker originally from Sydney and currently studying a Masters of Theatre (Writing). Fostering theatre has been at the heart of Ash’s life having grown up around musicians, writers and performers. She is so incredibly honoured to continue that tradition with The Dialog this year.

MYA HELOU (they/them) is an English and Theatre Studies major whose love of theatre was fostered by Shakespeare and classical Greek tragedies. They will take every opportunity to discuss either. 

The Dialog is supported by Union House Theatre.